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Killed the theater Star?

Bizzaro World Whitey Gleason

Bizzaro World Whitey Gleason

Rumors are circulating that Sports 1140 KHTK’s Whitey Gleason¬†is something of an Action Movie Star.¬†But are there two Whitey Gleasons?

Creep Miester Maximus

100% Original Rise Guy: Two Centuries and counting

One, a sharp witted broadcaster, mimic, parody song-crafter, and basketball whipping boy.

The other, the Bizarro Whitey Gleason?


Bizarro Whitey Gleason as we see him in 1988’s Die Hard


Is that an H&K MP5? Nice.

Here, Bizarro White Gleason ponders: Why I am I the normal brother?

Memorable and Compelling Radio? Can it be done?

I don’t always wear glasses

Until Bruce Willis interrupts his thoughts

Damn That Phantom!

Put down the gun Bruce, I do a pretty good Jay Leno…





Bruce, isn’t smitten with the Leno impersonation…

Can I have a machinegun, to scare all the kids down the street?

Eyes Wide Open

Following this, Bizarro Whitey Gleason finds himself adrift.

Trafficking in Human Organs

The depths of depravity

The depths of depravity

Threatening kids in a lunchroom

He's got a Gun!

And he’s not afraid to use it.

Apparently, all hippied up, and living in a commune

Letting himself go.

No respect for himself.

A humiliating low – swimsuit model

That's not <i>too</> ghey...

Next up, ghey men’s magazines

Finally becoming introspective

Candy Ass, can I see your Man Card?

Candy Ass, can I see your Man Card?

Before returning to the Chummy Pal we all know and love. Seen here rawkin’ the WalkMan, listening to the Bay City Rollers.

Wears this cap to bed.

He blames this look on the influence of his older brother

Apparently, Bizarro Whitey Gleason also has an older brother, Bizarro Phantom



Who greets parishioners at church as he prepares to read from Scripture, thusly

Hey Everybody!

A reading from the Book of “And The Horse You Rode In On”

Conclusion: The Bizarro Whitey Gleason has never been seen at Wiener Works. Therefore, there are two Whitey Gleasons.

Pat Novak For Hire 11/27/09

Pat Novak For Hire 11/27/09

Heard on Olde Time radio Pat Novak For Hire:

“Sooner or later you get burned, and it doesn’t make any difference whether you’re a man or a mouse. Because down in the waterfront, in San Francisco, they build the traps both ways… Down here, if you reach out to help a panhandler, the guy’ll take your arm and hand you back the dime… I rent boats and deal any place that’ll give a good trade-in on a second-hand soul.”

Pat Novak For Hire 11/13/09

Pat Novak For Hire 11/13/09

Heard on olde time radio’s Pat Novak For Hire:

“Around here a set of morals won’t cause any more stir than Mother’s Day in an orphanage. Maybe that’s not good, but that’s the way it is. And it wouldn’t do any good to build a church down here, because some guy would muscle in and start cutting the wine with wood alcohol. All you can do is try to make the books balance, and the easiest way to do that is to keep one hand on your billfold and the other hand on somebody else’s.”